Major League Baseball Cracks Down on Performance Enhancing Hugs



                       Masterful work Felix…….Masterful. The complete game, un-enhanced gem pitched by Felix Hernandez had it all: baseballs, bats, bases, players, and a stadium. Felix threw all 9 innings giving up 8 hits and 1 earned run in the 4-2 win over the Oakland Athletics. The most incredible stat of the game? Hernandez was truly dealing, throwing 115 pitches 80 of which were for strikes……80 strikes! He had all his pitches working,  looking as dominant as he had in his other starts this young season, but finally he got the run support to back it up. Raul Ibanez singled to right in the first to score Ichiro. Then, Jose Vidro, possibly playing for his job, had a two run double giving the Mariners a 3-0 lead. That’s all King Felix needed, but the M’s added one more on a double by Adrian Beltre in the third inning. Felix has beaten the A’s five straight times now….so he’s got that going for him.


Friday’s game may be the one I have been looking forward to most since spring training, as knuckleballer extraordinaire R.A. Dickey faces off against Joe Saunders (Nerd) of The Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim Angels….of Anaheim….Did I mention they are from Anaheim…..and that they are called the Angels…and that Anaheim is near Los Angeles? Now that we have that all sorted out, sort of, Dickey is getting his first big league start since a 2006 game where he was hammered by Detroit for 6 homeruns in just 3 1/3 innings. Heres to hoping it doesn’t go like that…….and to pitch a new Dave Niehaus catchphrase (cause he is totally reading this) “Give’em the Dickey….the R.A. Dickey” ® (“Give’em the Dickey” is a registered trademark. All rights are owned by Kids Incorporated as well as Stuff and Things Blog).


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3 Responses to “Major League Baseball Cracks Down on Performance Enhancing Hugs”

  1. Tory Says:

    Perhaps I missed something, but wasn’t this article going to be about hugs?

  2. TomEveryman Says:

    I think perhaps whomever wrote this was trying to make a joke with the title of the article even though it is very loosely related (he references Felix Hernandez’s performance being “un-enhanced) What an idiot.

  3. Old Gibbage Says:

    We got nothin better than RA freakin Dickey to toss out there? Perhaps Mr. McLaren’s philosophy is to lose every fifth start just to make things interesting.

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