They Took Our Jobs! Also a Dinosaur is Eating the City

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                                   It seems as far as the Sonics go, we have cut our loses and moved on. The future is not about the current Sonics, but a new, more futuristic Sonics. At least that is what one could assume after a Tuesday April 1st press conference held in Seattle. Former Sonic great and the captain of the 1979 world champion supersonics, Fred Brown, announced a plan, in conjunction with Dave Bean local Marketing Company Wong Doody, for a 1.2 Billion dollar multi use retractable roof stadium to be located in one of 5 selected sites, none of which they own, ranging from Seattle Center to the Seattle waterfront at pier 46.The catch…..the entire project is to be privately funded. The obvious first question is “April Fools”? No? Ok, well then the second question one might ask is how they plan on prying 1.2 Billion dollars out of wealthy locals, but both Brown and Bean seemed confident in people’s willingness to fork over the dough. A 3d model of the building is available at http://www.emeraldcitycenter.com. To be included along with the state of the art sports and concert venue are a Native Cultural Center, Pacific Northwest sports Hall of Fame, an Aviation and Aerospace building (whatever that means), a residential area and, my personal favorite, “The Retail Store of the Future”. The plan is incredibly ambitious and undeniably stupid. The only upside I see to this ridiculous plan is that it creates jobs for robot workers folding space sweaters in “The Retail Store of the Future.”

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2 Responses to “They Took Our Jobs! Also a Dinosaur is Eating the City”

  1. Robert Swift Says:

    I wonder if they will sell Dipping Dots “The Ice Cream of the Future” or Hypercolor shirts “The Clothing of the Future” in the “Retail Store of the Future”?

  2. Harold Reynolds Says:

    This site is pretty cool but definitely could use a story on good on Harold Reynolds and the money he was just awarded by ESPN for defamation of character…just a thought.

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